This year has been remarkable! So many changes have taken place in my life this year, internally and externally. Today is the 1 year anniversary of the greatest job ever. God has moved in and through my life, touching every aspect, this year. I feel closer to Him than I ever have in my entire life, and without all the struggle and fuss. It’s finally an easy relationship; I hear His voice and respond. I feel His love, and am changed. I met the greatest man ever, and will be marrying him in just 2 weeks and will gain two beautiful daughters as well. I finished a semester of college and managed A’s in English and my computer class and a C in Algebra. Not bad for not having taken any math classes in 17 years. I got a new car and my finances are somewhat in order. Of course, more money would be better, but at least I’m making it from one payday to the next without much struggle. I’ve lost 35 pounds and still working to lose more. I have started an exercise program and I am continuing to modify my diet to a workable, healthy plan.  So many things are finally going my way.

I have waited and prayed for many years to reach a point in my life where I truly felt happy, and I really believe that I’m there. There’s a nagging voice in the back of my mind that keeps telling me that this is only a dream and I’m going to wake up soon and find it all gone. But I recognize that voice, and it’s not the voice of my Father. My Father tells me that I have been faithful, so this is my reward and it’s not going away. He loves me, and has blessed me. I used to listen to that other voice, and I stayed in bondage to what it said. But this year I have learned the truth, and it has truly set me free!

I am so excited about everything that 2009 has in store for me! I know that each year, for the rest of my life, will be better than the one before. Not to say that there won’t be struggles, but I have the heart and mind now to overcome. And I have the support system I have always desired. I can make it through anything. With God and Josh by my side, there is nothing that will keep me down. I pray that everyone that I know and love finds all the joy and happiness that they have longed for in 2009. Have a happy new year!

Everything in my life is moving forward at the most overwhelming pace.  But despite the madness, I am immensely happy. We have just 4 weeks until the wedding, and trying to figure out how we are going to have time to get all my junk moved is a bit stressful. Josh has assured me that he can get it all done. I think I just have in my head a different plan than he does. I think his plan is to just box all my stuff up and move it, while I would like to go through everything and decide what to keep, what to sell, and what to throw away. I know that he wants us to be able to go through all the stuff we both have and prepare for a yard sale, I am just guessing that he would first like to get it all in one location (his house). This is fine, and definately less time consuming than my plan. Especially since a yard sale would probably reap greater benefits in the spring when the weather is a bit warmer. We may just try to get rid of some of the larger furniture items at first, and figure out how to store the rest until the great sale. I know I just need to relax and enjoy this time, but getting my mind to fall into line is another issue. I need to remind myself to breathe.

I am having the best time getting to know my soon to be stepdaughters. These girls are simply the greatest! I am so very blessed. They are so sweet and accepting. I know so many people who go through terrible times in the stepmother/stepdaughter relationship. I really hope everything continues to go well. I know that we will have conflicts and struggles, as I will with my natural children. But my prayer is that our love for one another will see us through. I pray that God gives me wisdom and understanding in dealing with these precious girls.

School is almost over, praise the Lord! I have my algebra final tonight, and that will be it. Well, for the most part. Wednesday I have a “post test” in English which is over literary terms. It’s the same test we took at the beginning of the semester & just measures how much we have learned. It will take all of 15 minutes max to take, and only counts against us if we do not show up to take it. I really wish she had allowed us to take the test last week, since all we had to do was turn in our research papers. But oh well. After that post test, all will be done and I’ll be getting my grades soon. Then all of my time will be devoted to getting my stuff transferred from New Boston to Texarkana. And we’re off…….

I am now engaged to the most wonderful man in the world! We will be eloping on January 16th to Eureka Springs. I am so very excited. I have dreamed about the man that God had for me, and I can truly say that Josh meets and exceeds my wildest dreams. I love God more everyday because of Josh. God gave me more than I could have ever asked for in him. I am immensely blessed!

I have gotten a little behind in my posting. With so much going on, it’s hard to keep up. Everything is going so well, it’s almost surreal at times. The Thanksgiving holidays were great. I was able to spend a lot of time with Josh and his girls. It was very good. The girls are just the sweetest. The 5 year old was in my lap or beside me or loving on me the whole weekend. Her daddy was feeling a little left out. It was precious. The 9 year old is very sweet too. Both of them have just opened their hearts to me in such an amazing way. I love them so much! I told him that it appears now that we have to stay together; for the kids. He thought that was funny.  Everything between Josh and I is steadily moving forward. We are both ready for Christmas. Things are simply falling into place in such awesome ways, there is no doubt in my mind that this is God’s plan.

We sold my old car this past weekend. I was able to pay off some old debt with it, which makes me feel so much better. I also got my Christmas bonus already, and my boss was fabulously generous. This helps make Christmas easier and I can get some other things paid. Again, God’s hand in moving so powerfully on our behalf that there is no doubt in either of our minds that He is in this relationship. He just keeps pouring out His blessings on us.

The weight loss is going well. I still managed to lose 2 pounds over the Thanksgiving holidays. I am enjoying my workouts at Curves. I was going to go this morning, but I wasn’t feeling very well, so I brought my stuff so I can go after work. I will be starting to reduce my carb-intake even more in the next few days. I have been craving carbs a lot the last couple of days, so this will be difficult. I don’t know if it’s hormonal or if it’s just my mind reacting to the knowledge of the elimination. I ate a very high protein dinner last night and it was great. I didn’t miss the carbs at all. I will just have to hold fast and determine that this is what I need to do. My biggest struggle is in the mornings. I don’t get up early enough to make a good breakfast before I leave the house, and sausage biscuits are much more appealing than a bowl of oatmeal. I just have to get up on time in order to make this work. I’ll try again tomorrow.